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Spleen

by SPLEEN

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Adriano Di Gaspero
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Ryan Spence
Ryan Spence thumbnail
Epiphany
Epiphany thumbnail
sueraven
sueraven thumbnail
Jess Hudsley
Jess Hudsley thumbnail
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1.
Will to Kill 01:32
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All I feel is less than whole All I have inside is hunger Won’t you help to fill this hole Won’t you help me vent my anger Tell me what good can I do Easier to do some evil Wrong is right and false is true Now I’m dancing with the devil Oh my will, my will is weak I don’t practice what I preach I don’t sow all that I reap I’m lost and low, my will is weak Tie my wrists and bind my feet Hold my tongue so I can’t speak Make me humble make me meek Make me strong, my will is weak I want to do something bad Something that can’t be forgiven Maybe I should kill a man Then I’d know the price of living Now my future’s looking bleak I’ve lost all I longed to keep Help me please I’m incomplete Hold me now, my will is weak I want to do something bad Something that can’t be forgiven
2.
Fag Machine 03:40
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I have never felt part of your scene I am not like you, I've never been I don’t hold your hopes or share your dreams I'm a motherfucking fag machine I don’t want to buy your magazine All it does is make me feel unclean I am only here to vent my spleen Like a motherfucking fag machine I'm still trying to vent past wars not won Of the lies of the father and the sins of this son I don’t care if you don’t like me And I see why you want to fight me But I’m not like all the other queens I’m not gonna try to treat you mean I don’t even wanna keep you keen I'm a motherfucking fag machine I have never felt part of your scene I am not like you, I've never been I don’t care if you think it’s obscene I'm a motherfucking fag machine But I'm tired of all the sex with strangers I'm through with all this flirting with danger I don’t care if I remain alone I just know I'm not a fucking clone I don’t hold your hopes or share your dreams I'm a motherfucking fag machine I don’t want to buy your magazine All it does is make me feel unclean I am only here to vent my spleen Like a motherfucking fag machine Hold me heal me make me fresh Cleanse me, these sins of the flesh I have never felt part of your scene I am not like you, I've never been I don’t care if you think it’s obscene I’m a motherfucking fag machine But I'm not like all the other queens I'm not gonna try to treat you mean I don’t even wanna keep you keen I'm a motherfucking fag machine But I'm tired of all the sex with strangers I'm through with all this flirting with danger Don’t go down in the park Don’t go down in the dark Don’t get down on your knees Don’t sell yourself to sleaze Oh don’t go down there please You’ll get a bad disease It makes you feel unclean Just like a fag machine I have never felt part of your scene I am not like you, I've never been I don’t hold your hopes or share your dreams I'm a motherfucking fag machine I don’t want to buy your magazine All it does is make me feel unclean I am only here to vent my spleen Like a motherfucking fag machine
3.
Masochismo 02:34
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My mouth and tongue flood with saliva’s salt As flame flushes my ears, and blood, my brain And all my skin writhes with a sense of fault -As livid with the parasites of shame A second fist hits lip and rips red hot Saliva drips, now marbled with bright red A million worms amass within my gut As muffled ringing resonates my head Throw all the world can throw at me Let it all flow, bring in on Certain in my uncertainty What don’t kill me will make me strong Please take me with vivacity and verve Or hate me with raw passion and pure zeal Just let me feel that something’s touched a nerve Or show me something real that I can feel You beat me with your barrages of blame -Attempt to rectify me with your fist And even though I writhe in fear and shame You’ll never truly hurt a masochist Throw all the world can throw at me Let it all flow, bring in on Certain in my uncertainty What don’t kill me will make me strong My mouth and tongue flood with saliva’s salt As flame flushes my ears, and blood, my brain And all my skin writhes with a sense of fault -As livid with the parasites of shame A second fist hits lip and rips red hot Saliva drips, now marbled with bright red A million worms amass within my gut As muffled ringing resonates my head Throw all the world can throw at me Let it all flow, bring in on Certain in my uncertainty What don’t kill me will make me strong
4.
Turning Tide 02:34
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When subside the tides of learning When my reservoir drains dry What will then fulfill my yearning What will brighten up my sky What will then keep my heart burning Fuel the fire in my eye Will the world still go on turning When the embers fade and die Will I even yearn at all When my inspiration fades Or just curl into a ball And just draw down all the shades Will my silent world grow small Retiring in the mire I’ve made Or will I reel so from my fall I reach for the razor-blade What’s the meaning of my birth Why these strange sad songs I’m singing Have I sung a thing of worth Is the bell I ring worth ringing Why turn misery to mirth Are my syphilitic gifts worth giving Am I tent pegged to the turf Of a life that’s not worth living When subside the tides of learning When my reservoir drains dry What will then fulfill my yearning What will brighten up my sky What will then keep my heart burning Fuel the fire in my eye Will the world still go on turning When the embers fade and die
5.
Never Known 03:14
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I wish I’d never seen your face And looked deep in those eyes I wish I had the insight To see through your cheap disguise I wish I wasn’t blinded By a longing to be loved I wish I wasn’t weak I should be cynical and tough I wish I’d never know you Wish I’d never heard your lies I wish I’d never glimpsed The silent suffering in your eyes And felt that I could feel you I hoped that I could heal you But now I wish I’d never known you As I’ll bet you wish you’d never met me Why did I think that I could fix you When I opened up my heart You left me bruised and broken Should have seen it at the start Now I’m at the end of a great mess I should not have let begin This war that you created That neither of us could win I wish I’d never know you Wish I’d never heard your lies I wish I’d never glimpsed The pent-up pain behind your eyes And felt that I could feel you I hoped that I could heal you Oh why is my heart guided By such longing and such lust That it lets down its defences As it opens wide with trust For someone who was toxic Who would only drag me down You were the weight around my neck That tried to make me drown Well now your poison’s in my system You’re still underneath my skin And I wish I’d never met you Wish I’d never let you in I wish I’d never know you Wish I’d never heard your lies I wish I’d never glimpsed That tortured terror in your eyes And felt that I could feel you I hoped that I could heal you But now I wish I’d never known you Now I wish I’d never known you Now I wish I’d never known
6.
Screwed Love 04:56
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Show my mercy I never meant to cause you harm My heart is broken And you’ve twisted both my arms You were my mirror There was so much you made me see Now I see clearer That you reflect the bad in me In turn I’ll take all I can take And I will twist all things around I’ll test your limits till you break And I will kick you when you’re down Is this true love This screwed love Is this true love This screwed love Please forgive me I never meant you any harm My heart is open Now that you’ve broken both my arms You know I miss you In your absence I grow sick Because I need you Just like a junkie needs a fix In turn you’ll take all you can take And you will twist all things around You’ll test my limits till you break me And then rape me when I’m down And I thank you, and I thank you For the moments that you gave For making me your lover And your brother, and your slave In this screwed love This screwed love Is this true love This screwed love Please excuse me I didn’t mean to make a fuss I know I chose this I must’ve know that soon enough I would feel trapped here In the confines of your cage But I chose this I submitted to your rage Yes In truth I asked for all this And I mapped out my own fate To be the vent for all your anger All your hunger and your hate So I thank you, oh I thank you For the moments that you gave For making me your lover And your brother, and your slave In this screwed love This screwed love Is this true love This screwed love Is this true love This screwed love Is this true love This screwed love
7.
Bury Me Now / Bleed 05:12
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I’ve fallen by the wayside I fear there is no upside I dug myself a hole So I’ll lie in it Come on then bury me now I’m digging myself under I tore myself asunder I dug myself a hole So I’ll lie in it Come on then bury me now ‘Cause when you’re in the shit you better Find some way out of it or else you Keep sinking, sinking down Why not lie in it Come on then bury me now To many times I cried I don’t want no suicide But when you're dead inside Then you may as well Come on then bury me now My soul is soiled and rotten I think I’ve reached rock bottom I dug myself a hole So I’ll lie in it Come on then bury me now I grasp but can’t catch hold and What soul I had is sold and I dug myself a hole So I’ll lie in it Come on then bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now Bury me bury me bury me now So I’ll die in it come on then bury me now Sometimes I want sometimes I need To penetrate the skin and get beneath the surface Find out what it means to bleed Sometimes I want sometimes I need To lacerate the skin and open up the surface Find out what it means to bleed I can’t be more than what I am And what I am is less than I could be If I were something more than what I am So tear apart this little man So I can be a better man Through being torn apart and finding what I am I am an orifice, a mister, I’m a blister But I wouldn’t fist my sister Cause she knows how women bleed Every month the menstrual mood swings Hitting hard with aches like bruising And a sense of loss and losing all because we need to breed I can’t be more than what I am And what I am is less than I could be If I were something more than what I am So tear apart this little man So I can be a better man Through being torn apart and finding what I…. AM… Sometimes I want sometimes I need To penetrate the skin and get beneath the surface Find out what it means to bleed Sometimes I want sometimes I need To lacerate the skin and open up the surface Find out what it means to bleed I can’t be more than what I am And what I am is less than I could be If I were something more than what I am So tear apart this little man So I can be a better man Through being torn apart and finding what I… AM…
8.
Furnace 03:01
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There's some who'd want to hurt you Some want to see you bleed As others would pervert you To satisfy their greed This world is red in tooth and claw The hunger to survive I'm hurt yet I come back for more Pain shows me I'm alive And sinking in my darkest hour So sure I will expire I'm born again, born again from waves Waves of blood and fire There's some who'd want to break you To stunt all you can be Don't let their cruel words take you Down to uncertainty It's hate that feeds their anger And fear that feeds their hate Don't be the one to shoulder The burden of that weight And sinking in my darkest hour So sure I will expire I'm baptised, baptised in these waves Waves of blood and fire This is all I have to say I cannot tell you more It's in this fiery furnace That my hardened heart was forged And burning in the ashes Of my youth's funeral pyre A heart aglow, heart aglow With blood and fire

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released January 24, 2020

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SPLEEN Brighton, UK

Spleen are a five-piece alternative, post-punk, queercore group from Brighton UK, with electro / disco influences and Gothic Sensibilities.

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